In a strange piece of news, North Korea recently signed up for a Facebook account and a Twitter feed, officially making them hipper than my parents. I’ve already started following the Twitter feed, which so far consists mainly of taunts aimed at South Korea and the United States, not to mention links to some really whacked out YouTube videos. I also submitted a friend request to their Facebook account, but now I’m having second thoughts about that. Here’s eight reasons why:
- Your FarmVille farm gets collectivized and wiped out by drought.
- Constant invitations to like pages such as “Lee Myung-bak is a loser imperialist aggressor lolz” and “Dear Leader will save all from impotent United States!!!$@#”
- Annoyingly vague status updates obviously meant to fish for responses or sympathy, like “Ever have one of those days where you just want to cross the 38th parallel?” or “Kim Jong-il is this close to just pushing the button!”
- They can’t tell the difference between they’re and their.
- Every North Korean citizen is forced to sign up for an account and friend them just so they’ll look popular.
- 2,000 photos, all of Kim Jong-il, all of them tagged.
- They insist on playing every single “Which [random shitty TV show] character are you???” or “Which song by [random shitty band] are you???” quiz and posting the results.
- Forget Rickrolling, you’ve just been Kimrolled!