For the first Album Cover of the Week posting of 2012, I was hoping to find a good New Year’s themed cover. But instead I stumbled across a bunch of old vinyl showing just how totally unhip white people could be whilst partying. Let’s go with that instead.

Happy 2012!

Frankie Paul and the International Polka Band — Polka Party

Is she looking up her own skirt?

Munyan & Floyd Lockhart w/The Rhythm Rangers — Square Dance Party

Square is right.

Merv Griffin’s Dance Party

Slop and bop with Merv!

You know you want to hear Merv Griffin sing and swing to “The Charanga,” so here you go.

The Mayfair All-Star Orchestra — Frat House Party

Ah, the legendary Kappa Gamma Dorka.

Teen Age Dance Party

Yeah, she was a teen when FDR was in office.

Wanda Jackson — There’s a Party Goin’ On

I can think of two things wrong with that subtitle.

Joe Reisman and His Orchestra — Party Night at Joe’s

Gee, I don't know if I can stand a whole night of this craziness.

Ray Anthony — Arthur Murray Dance Party

Big horns, pornstaches, this one's got it all.

12 Top Hits

Look at that eunuch swing!

The Bruce Johnston Surfing Band — Surfer’s Pajama Party

Recorded live on the UCLA campus... with the professors.

Jerry Colonna — Jerry Colonna Entertains At Your Party

And by "entertains" he means "creeps you the fuck out."